"On behalf of [redacted], I would like to thank you for allowing us the opportunity to review The Skull Ring.
Our editorial staff has reviewed your submission. Unfortunately, we have determined that it is not right for us at this time. We regret that, due to the many submissions we receive, it is impossible to offer any individual comments.
Thank you for thinking of [redacted]. We wish you the very best of luck with your manuscript. Signed, Publisher."
Written today but not sent:
"Dear [redacted], I thank you for your rejection but it doesn't meet my needs at this time. Due to the number of rejections I get, I am unable to make individual comments to describe why your publishing company is not suited to my project, but in general, the reasons authors reject such proposals are a lack of originality, a failure to understand today's market, or a competitive environment in which most books lose money. I do thank you for your wishes of luck, though. I feel luckier already. Signed, Author. Oh, and P.S:
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4 comments:
That's freakin' hilarious, Scott!
By the way, I just blogged about the book at http://musingsofdarkintruder.blogspot.com/. Hope the sales continue strong!
Perfect, Scott. Absolutely, wonderfully, perfect!
LOL. You made my day. I'm going to design something like this when I get my next rejection from an agent - but I think I'm going to actually send it. Christa
Well, I actually didn't intend to be a smart-aleck, as I'd already decided that I'd be better off, make more money, and find more readers publishing the ebook on my own. They are absolutely right to reject it if they don't feel it will work for them. Publishers, writers, agents, booksellers, and consumers all have different motives, and only occasionally do they overlap. And that's called "Harry Potter" or "Twilight."
It's very important for writers not to get bitter--it's sad and self-defeating. But you can get a chuckle or two along the way if you don't take yourself too seriously.
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